dear Mother,

Thank you for your years of advice and care. They have been duly noted and enjoyed.

When I asked you a question tonight real quick via text, I did not expect the response that I got.
Please don't call me at 12:07am to give me a lecture about how I don't make decisions quick enough.

I am sorry that everyone in our family takes their lovely ole time before taking action. I, for one, like to weigh all the consequences and factors. That is merely how I function. I hope that, one day, maybe you will learn that I am not exactly like you.

Sincerely,

me